before we meet for supper

there are some things you must know about me.

firstly, the choice for supper wasn't coincidental nor nonchalant. all that was a farce. night is the best time to feel slightly removed from the harsh realism of reality, and the best time to indulge in some semblance of romance. also, people are careless and freer in the night, none of the harsh sunlight glaring on your pimples and all that stuff. even rain seems friendlier in the cover of darkness.

so, there are somethings you must know about me. like i have seriously gained weight, a lot of it, since you last saw me. i'm talking uber blubber fats that jiggle enough to send tremors throughout a radius of five miles. no kidding. and, as part of the i-am-so-unconcerned-and-au-naturale cover, i will not have makeup on like i did the last time you saw me. which means you will be able to see my eyes are actually slitty my teeth huge my cheeks colourless my eyebrows faint and my lips pale.

and because of blubber nation in my belly ass and thighs, i cannot pull off the wear-loose-clothes-and-still-smoke-hotness look. which means i will look either wrapped like a dumpling or huge like an auntie.

so yes. these are what you must know about me before we meet for supper. gives a whole new meaning to The Last Supper.. amen.