in hope of salvation

hello.

i am frightened of many things. when i am frightened (and i am frightened of many things) i will scratch the underside of and between my toes, the back of my neck, and i will hit my head. i do not fancy people seeing scars on me and i am frightened of knowing for sure i am mad so i do not do anything more drastic. people who dare to hurt themselves properly are much braver than i am, i have no overwhelming hysteria only this fright. scratching eases the fright.

when i am frightened i also cry a lot. i cry enough to give many children water to drink. if all resources were controlled by a benign insightful higher being everyone would have fair share of aircon and cupcakes. mongolia is gorgeous and the people are struggling to survive. if my fright could mitigate unfairness the world would be a very fair place. such transference is unfortunately not possible.